Neanderthal
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https://www.livescience.com/archaeology/why-did-homo-sapiens-outlast-all-other-human-species#:~:text=Ancient tools%2C art and other,other species perished%2C Sawchuk suggested.
We had all of the species diversification though.
Baby: From getting thrown around by sloth to save him from dodos to slaughtering a whole viking village.
Manny: From protecting the baby to dying to the baby as an elder.
Peaches: From cute tiny little thing playing around with possums to badass herd leader.
Diego: From strong independent saber-tooth tiger to a divorced hobo.
Soto: This time he dies to a baby.
So, I was scrolling today through Terrifying Tyrannosaur page on TV Tropes today when I came across this weird title that can be translated to Age of the Great Dinosaurs. Having nothing better to do, I watched it.
The film released in 1979 under the direction of Shoutarou Ishinomori, a guy that worked on multiple installments of Cyborg 009 and... SHERLOCK HOLMES 1996 ANIME SERIES. Haven't watched either.
What is supposed to be the plot:
It tells a story about "effeminate guy" known as Jun, who likes flowers and is sad that humans are contaminating the environment (usual stuff). He is bullied at school for reading poetry books (I can relate to his bullies), and his mother complains about his education. That thread is brushed aside immediately, because (WARNING: This is gonna be cringe) UFO CONTRACTS HIM!
It tells him to go on a beach, where he meets his love interest Remi. Unfortunately, this is where my least favourite character in the film joins: Chobi. Chobi is annoying little brat and younger brother of Remi, who stalks her all the way to the beach and mocks for having a boyfriend, as if that was something unnatural.
After pointing out that she just meet Jun, UFO teleports all three away and tells a story how humans lost their empathy, because they terraform the planet. Then it teleports them to cretaceous period for them to learn a lesson they already know. Chobi assaults some dino with stick and cuts his tail off, then discovers a bunch of eggs, from which Triceratops breed hatches. Tyrannosaurus the Immortal arrives and eats all but one trikes, then gets its eye gouged out. TTI then kills a Pachycephalosaurus female that two males have been fighting over and Chobi complains about their cowardice.
As usual, volcano explodes and all the dinos perish. The only ones left alive are Tyrannosaurus and "Toppy" (a hyper-grown Triceratops that survived earlier). Undying Tyranno kills Toppy and we go fast-forward to THE ICE AGE.
"What killed the dinosaurs? THE ICE AGE!"
After some montage of mammoths trampling Smilodons and humans killing mammoths (yeah, empathy never existed to begin with), T-Rex, who is somehow still alive, steals the killed mammoth from humans. Cavemen then make a sacrifice to Tyrannosaurus, offering some girl and singing. The song calms T-Rex down, only for Chobi to butt in and piss off T-Rex. Getting fire in their white eyes, cavemen insert infinite ammo cheat code and throw 1,000,000,000 spears onto T-Rex, killing it. Then UFO arrives and teleports kids back to present, saying that they will welcome mankind with open arms when they learn compassion. Movie ends.
Review:
Truly a terrible movie. Go on MyAnimeList.net and you'll find exactly NO ONE recommending this film.
-Characters are all shallow and have zero character, besides little brat with flaming eyes that I hate. It is insane that Tyrannosaurus, generic super persistent movie predator, makes more expressions than two other main characters in the whole runtime. Remi and Jun have as much personality as Ford Brody from Gareth Edwards' Godzilla (to hell with that movie), always having blank look on their faces and never reacting to A. N. Y. T. H. I. N. G.
-Plot is entirely stupid and makes no sense whatsoever. What exactly is UFO's point? Mankind is shown killing more than just some roadside flowers in prehistory, and "empathy" never existed to begin with. Why are they throwing three insignificant children into past? How did the Tyrannosaurus survive getting stabbed in the scrotum by Triceratops?How did the T-Rex, cold-blooded naked reptile, survive in ice age for millions of years?
-Animation is also bad. Frames are constantly reused and characters go off-model at least once. They switch between animating rain to using some generic filter over and over.
-What I can't put my finger on is how bizarre mood is in this film. Take Pachycephalosaurus scene for example: one moment you have shell falling from Ankylosaurus in goofy fashion and back fins falling off of Stegosaurus, the next moment Tyrannosaurus comes in and kills female Terra Formars-style. The film can't seem to decide whatever deaths are too brutal to show onscreen or just show them to the audience. Bizarre mood whiplash.
Final rating: 2/10.
Aftermath:
-Was Godzilla's roar protected by copyright at the time? Because T-Rex uses it ALL THE TIME in this movie. Either that or Gamera's roar. I guess filmmakers must have been lucky and Toho just didn't realize this movie's existence.
I haven't really posted on this website in a long time, I have a few reasons for doing so. First, I broke my arm and my phone because I tripped off of a 10-12 foot tall ledge which led down to a creek where there were several rocks. I smashed my arm on those rocks, and my phone fell out of my pocket mid fall into the creek. It’s almost certainly a death sentence if this happens while you're caught out in the middle of nowhere, but I managed to survive, mostly because my friends helped with my wounds.
We had to stop in the now abandoned city of Tampa, Florida for this, though. We had taken shelter in a former apartment building. I don’t have any pictures of this since my arm was at that point, infected and broken. We were there for almost the entire month of October, and some of november. By then it was clear that winter was going to kill us if we didn't leave the floridan peninsula and get to somewhere in the caribbean.
On top of that, we were all definitely sick. I had heard rumors that a nuclear detonation had occurred for some reason in Mobile, Alabama, and all the stuff in the atmosphere was drifting towards Florida and was affecting the weather. When it rained, it rained this black liquid which made your skin itch if you touched it. When it snowed, the snow wasn't even white, it was this blackish-gray stuff. We had melted the normal snow for water, but we were not touching the gray snow. There wasn't enough that it would kill us, but it has definitely shortened our life spans by maybe 5-10 years.
We also had a few symptoms of Radiation sickness, which has passed, but we did have slight hair loss. Sam and I had started bleeding from the nose, and gums, and we all felt very weak in areas which had a lot of fallout. We got out of that area though, which was around the middle of the state of florida.
The green area is the fallout area, or what I estimate it to be.
Now, we are at the southern tip of florida. It’s still pretty bad here, but nowhere as bad as the middle of florida. Also, I'm pretty sure the radiation is affecting the dinosaurs. Don’t know how though. One pretty good thing about what happened was that in those affected areas, there are no lights. I’m assuming it's because the radiation could mess with the electronics on the lights, and yes, theyarehere confirmed that they are fully mechanical.
Nothing feels real anymore. I don't know what else to talk about but one thing ive noticed is a strange amount of military aircraft. I don’t know why they do that. They don’t seem to be dangerous. I even took a few pictures.
Here's proof of what im seeing, those air airplane contrails.
And I actually managed to take a picture of one of them.
My friend said it was an F-22 Raptor. He also said it was almost certainly piloted by one of the people who had betrayed us at camp Avalon, or supported the cause of the people at camp Avalon.
I'm trying to fill you guys in on as much as possible but sorry, I just don't know its so hard to know now. I've been seeing other people, except they cant be people. They cant be. They try to talk to me but they dont have the same cadence as a normal person but nobody else believes me. Are they real? Is there anything that could do that?
21 Votes in Poll
@Rexyisdebest @CreepyLegos @Mediterranean Mapper @Firekong1 @TotallynotaHellionWarden @Cooner21 @LeanYeenMachine
Claw: What does emperor want now?
General: Nothing, just to thank you for killing the competition.
Claw: What do you mean?
General: We heard about your tribes fight with the cannibals, truly... Impressive. We did hear that you had to burn some forest to do so, but the emperor still thanks you, nonetheless.
Claw: So, you called me here to give thanks? Seems pointless to me.
Claw: Not just any thanks; the emperor wants to donate some animals for the gladiator arena for the village you're building in the Humid-Lands.
Claw: Hmmm... I am intrigued, tell me more.
General: We have river-lurkers, one-horns, elephants, mammoths, snakes, sloths-
Claw: Sloths?
General: Yes, sloths. Freshly shipped from the new world.
Claw: What is new world?
General: (Sigh) When the ground shook, land opened between us and a new world. There is a gap; big enough for all aquatic creatures to get through, but small enough for our boats to swim through Aswell. I have promised myself to never act stupid there again...
Claw: Why so?
General: Because of THOSE two (Pointing to huge snake and huge river-lurker).
Claw: What the?!
General: Those two managed to kill off 10 of our men, so do you want them?
Claw: You ask as though I would consider choices, of course I want them!
General: Good to hear, but let us get this straight, after the purchase of these two, you must pay us in meat.
Claw: Why so?
General: We could benefit from a trade. You give us meat which isn't easy to catch here, we give you gear, weapons, and armor.
Claw: Sounds good, tell the emperor I accept the deal.
General: Have a good conquest sir!
Claw: Uh... thanks.
(Trapped ep2 coming to a fandom near you)
This is based on a creepypasta. I recommend reading this and the previous parts first. I'll link it below.
https://www.gasstationjack.com/post/the-dark-god-part-1
The story:
Hey everyone, I'm back. And I have some things to tell you about. So, I did some research about the dimension where we're at. And I think there are some things I have to tell you. I don't know what to start with, but here are some 'fun facts' about the timeline the sh*tty Gas Station at the edge of town found itself in.
To start off, the mere existence of the prehistoric creatures being alive is actually one of the biggest scientific mysteries in this place. And there were several theories about how dinosaurs and the like somehow didn't become extinct, all lacking enough evidence to help make any progress on the topic. The leading theories actually come from passages in the bible. No, I'm not even joking. That's how mysterious this is. Religion somehow dominated science on how the dinosaurs survived that flying rock from space.
This also led to dinosaurs and prehistoric creatures being used for many purposes in recorded history. The Mongolian empire used velociraptors to invade Asia as an example. The raptors were actually more effective against the Russians from the north. Another example of this was when Alexander the Great and his army fought a spinosaurus and easily killed it with little casualties. It was apparently very common for ancient civilizations to use and just coexist with these. Even in modern history they still used them. Megalodons were usually in conflicts with nineteenth century whalers. And microraptors are used for reconnaissance to this very day!
Anyways, that aside. I found out that the usual Gas Station weirdness is still here. The man in the trenchcoat is still making his rounds at the establishment. Rarely changing. Rocco the mutated or inbred raccoon and his brood are still here hiding in the ceiling of the Gas Station. I would usually try to get them out, but it's my least priority so far. The locals have gone into the gas station so much that I'm not sure if our entire stock could survive two weeks, let alone a month. Luckily a supply truck came in. But it only got our stock up to half of what it was before the reality hop at least. As of writing this, the locals have not been visiting the Gas Station that much. So far, only about five locals have gone into the gas station today. Also, Spencer is here! In fact I think that psycho is planning something. He has been calling the gas station constantly. Telling us that "I'll see you soon!" And that he will be showing us his new boss. Whatever that boss is. I don't know. And I don't want to know.
Anyways, here's the journal entries I have for you this time.
March 3rd, 2018
7:30- My thoughts have been a blur after the research I did. After I came back and finished my research exploration twenty five minutes ago. Nothing really happened besides that Benjamin woke up and wasn't fond of me leaving the gas station for a brief amount of time. He said that "Ya could've got yourself killed! Do you want to DIE JACK!?" not long before he scolded me. But I ignored it and told him to buy something or just leave! Which he reluctantly did. He purchased a bag of beef jerky.
I also found out that the time here is way different than our home reality. It's March in 2018 in this place. While in reality, it would be late 2017. It will be December of 2017 when the gas station gets back to normal reality. It's really confusing and I think people don't truly understand how convoluted reality hopping is.
8:30- I went to take out the trash, and that Arthropleura is still there. It looked like it was unconscious though! And I luckily didn't have to fight a giant millipede! Thank God! I would probably get my ass handled by it anyway! Even if I wasn't injured probably!
Marlboro told me that Mussolini was killed because… let's just say he liked Microraptors too much in this timeline. I'd wish Marlboro was lying but I did some googling. And he wasn't lying in the slightest bit! And I'm now more traumatized! All thanks to a former cultist and full-time crazy person!
9:00- Spencer Middleton called us. He said that "I know you're here Jack. I have unfinished business with you, and with that old maniac killing my boss. I want to pay you a little visit." He stated it all in a terrifyingly calm tone. And hung up before I could reply. I was speechless.
"Hey Carlos?" I asked.
Carlos was leaning on the counter nonchalantly and writing on the back of a receipt paper.
"Yeah homie, what is it!?"
"Spencer called us a second ago."
Carlos widened his eyes and replied with a dreadful "God no! Please no! Spencer is in this dimension too!"
I nodded, "Yeah, he's here! Go tell Benjamin and Marlboro about this! I think we should be on the lookout!"
Carlos sighed and said "Sure. But I still don't get why you don't call Jerry his actual name! You still call him Marlboro homie?!"
March 4th, 2018
12:30- Literally nothing was going on before I was writing this. We just got raided by neanderthals. When we were organizing in the supply closet. They broke in using rocks and spears. They tried to steal our stuff but Benjamin shot a good chunk of them. The rest just scattered away and left. Carlos and Jerry had to bury about five bodies. We had to temporarily close to clean up the mess. It was that bad! It took two hours just to get rid of the blood.
1:00- Benjamin is pissed! He found out that I left yesterday for a few minutes. He told me that "You can't be doing this Jack! You know that you could've been KILLED!"
I simply told him that he was not my boss and that he should be more grateful that we let him stay here in the first place. And that he should buy something or just leave the gas station. He simply groaned, called me a dumbass and bought some skittles. Before heading back into the backroom to make improvised weapons. I'm having a feeling that Benjamin is going to snap one of these days. And if that happens, then we're going to be in quite the predicament. A predicament that could send me to an even earlier grave!
1:40- An ankylosaurus just broke Jerry's car. And now the former cultist is really pissed. I was reading the usual book when Jerry opened the door with a very angry flair that I could only describe as salty. "JACK! SOME GODDAMN DINOSAUR BROKE MY CAR!" He yelled out while pointing at me. "You gotta see this!"
I looked at Marlboro with an incredulous look. "Oh really?" I replied while getting up, which took forever because of my crutches. I then just followed Jerry to the back. And what I saw was a car dented beyond belief. The car's tire was broken into a million pieces. I'm not a car guy, but I knew Marlboro's car was destroyed.
"Damn! It seems like your car is destroyed Jerry!"
"No sh*t! What the hell happened here! I swear I'm going to f***ing KILL THAT DAMN D-"
"Jerry! What did this do? Stop raging like a nine year old and give me some context damnit!"
Jerry yelled out "A ANKYLOSAURUS YOU MORON!" He then just went on a long rant about it that I wouldn't want to write about because it was that pointless. I just left in reply.
March 5th, 2018
5:30- Another cultist came back and started rambling on about the holy scorpion. What is the holy scorpion anyways! Anyways the cultist tried to kill Carlos again, but he died by Jerry shooting him.
"Damn it Marlboro!" I yelled out, "I just mopped the floor damnit!"
"Oh come on man!" Marlboro replied.
But then I heard Carlos scream out "NOT AGAIN!"
We both turned to Carlos pointing at the dead cultist. The cultist… was another freaking Kieffer!
To be continued.
And here's your daily dose of Terrifying Dinosaurs:
Mudkip forces you to like Mudkips and Tyrannosaurus agrees
Requested by @Rexyisdebest
Zangoose and Cryogonal kill Lagerpeton and his dumbass friends because Lagerpeton is mid tbh
Requested by @Mimikyutube
Archaeopteryx fails at Wii Play Motion's Skip Skimmer
Dunkleosteus swallows a Turtwig
Galarian Linoone and Obstagoon earrape a Plesiosaurus
Florges continues to make Iguanodon her servant
Volcanion makes a Neanderthal depressed
Centrosaurus crushes a Weedle
Update:
So, I can tell that people are getting tired of this series, so if you don't want to get annoyed, ignore these posts, for those still interested, feel free to still make requests
28 Votes in Poll
39 Votes in Poll
26 Votes in Poll
Neanderthals when the get hit by woolly rhino and fall off a cliff: "uunga bunga"
Translation: tis but a scratch
Hey everyone I draw this caveman or Neantherthal name spear from Primal