Let's finish this
@Interstellar Voyager @MimikBoogTube @Naganadel King of the Stars @Ganimes @Savage Almond @Some latin letter @Dinoguy22
The Dude and Gryposaurus are running through the halls, when earth quakes from the robots landing
Gryposaurus: What was that?
The Dude: The big one… they’re probably after Nodosaurus!
Gryposaurus: Oh man, things are gonna be messy!
The Dude: We’ll figure something out, anyway here’ s the room we’re looking for, there could still be a bunch of bots inside guarding it, so be careful.
He tries to open the door, but it’s locked.
Gryposaurus: Damn it, there’s a code lock here.
The Dude: Shit… uhh try 1234!
Gryposaurus: There’s no way that’ll work…
He punches it in, and to no one’s surprise, the little screen above the key bad spells out ‘ACCES DENIED’
The Dude: What about…
Gryposaurus: You’re not gonna guess it man…
The Dude: 0987! If it’s not 1234, it’s gotta be 0987!
Gryposaurus punches the code in and once again, ‘Access Denied’
The Dude: Let me do it!
Gryposaurus: WOAH…!
He pushes Gryposaurus aside and kneels down in front of the keypad, punching in random codes, until he triggers some sort of timer lock, for entering the wrong code too many times.
The Dude: What! This is bullshit!
Gryposaurus slams his front leg into the keypad, sparks flash out and an alarm turns on, but the door opens.
The Dude: Well that works, I suppose…
The room is full off large storage shelves, full of items confiscated from prisoners, with a conveyor belt that’s currently disabled running through the middle and like The Dude suspected, there’s a lesser group of Tax Bots inside, and they immediately fire open fire at them, in response The Dude and Gryposaurus duck behind the conveyor belt for cover.
The Dude: I hate those clankers!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B4wE-Jgzh0A
There is a laser rifle left behind on the conveyor belt, The Dude grabs and leans out from behind cover trying to fire it, but the gun’s safety is on. He hides again quickly, to disable the safety switch, before leaning back out and blasting 3 of the clankers in quick succession. Meanwhile Gryposaurus sees another Tax Bot trying to flank them, running in between the storage shelves, so Gryposaurus slams his tail into the shelf, causing it to fall onto the Tax Bot and crush it.
The Dude keeps the pressure on the bots, firing the laser rifle, managing to blast another one to death. One of the Tax Bots takes cover behind a crate, from which he launches a missile into the air. The Dude sees the missile fly towards him and jumps to the side, narrowly avoiding the explosion
The Dude: Oh shit!
He drops to the ground, the rifle landing a bit in front of him, he gets up and grabs it while dashing for cover, one of the Tax Bots hitting his tail before he manages to vanish behind a storage shelf. He groans in pain, cursing to himself.
Gryposaurus peeks out from another shelf, studying the situation, there are 5 more bots left, too many to just blindly rush in, all marching towards The Dude’s hiding spot.
Gryposaurus: What to do..!? What to do..?!
He looks at the junk laying on the ground from the shelf he toppled to take out the previous bot, and notices what looks like an EMP grenade laying on the floor, he grabs it and chucks it towards the group of bots, not knowing he has to arm the grenade first, so all it does is just bounce off one of their heads. They all turn towards him.
Gryposaurus: uh oh
They open fire, with Gryposaurus running for his life trying to evade their blast, fortunately this is just the distraction The Dude needed as he peeks out from his cover again, he swiftly blasts the bots heads off with well placed shots before they can even turn back to him, the last one standing realizes he’s the only one left.
Tax Bot: Applying new strategy… Tactical retreat
The robot bolts towards the exit, but The Dude just takes aim again and blasts him as he runs, he drops to the floor and from the momentum, slides into the wall, just a bit to the right of the exit. So close yet so far.
The Dude: Well that takes care of them, good thing Nodosaurus distracted them, otherwise there’d be a whole lot more of them sitting in here.
Gryposaurus: So how do we find our stuff?
The Dude: We just got here really, they have to sort them in some way, either way, we’ll have to go look for it.
Cut to Nodosaurus running through the halls, as a giant robot fist punches a hole through the wall, just a little behind him.
Capitalsaurus: Running won’t save you, scum!
Nodosaurus breathes heavily as he continues running at full speed, the robotic fist comes down again up ahead, punching through the ceiling, Nodo-Windu focuses, channeling the force beneath him to launch himself forward, narrowly passing under the fist as it crashes into the ground.
Nodosaurus: I don’t think it's very smart to destroy your base like that!
Capitalsaurus: Eh, it’s fine. Taxpayer dollars will cover it.
Nodosaurus: You don’t that’s a waste of resources?
Capitalsaurus: Eh, I have plenty of resources to waste.
With that response, Capitalsaurus fires missiles out of his mech at Nodo-Windu.
Nodosaurus: OH SHIT
The missiles rain down, leveling the area in fiery explosions.
We then cut back to The Dude and Nodosaurus, who having found The Dude’s back pack, run into the hangar now, trying to find a ship they could use to bail. They see some Tax Bots loading up shit onto one of the ships docking there, this is their chance.
The Dude: Alright. I’ll cover you, you’ll throw an EMP granade at the folks around the ship, we rush in and take the hell off.
Gryposaurus: Okay, I got it.
The Dude: Now, don’t forget to arm it before throwing like that last one.
Gryposaurus: Yeah, I know this time…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIRiCtvDSc0
With that, The Dude ignites his yellow lightsaber, leaping down and cleaving a Tax Bot vertically in two as he drops, swiftly slicing 2 more on his flanks apart, before Gryposaurus follows him down. The Tax Bots scattered around the hangar open fire at them. The Dude swings his lightsaber to deflect incoming laser bolts, protecting himself and Gryposaurus, who arms the EMP and hurls it towards the bots around the ship, the grande bounces off the ground a couple times, before detonating at their feet, deactivating it.
The Dude: Nice, let’s go!
They run towards the ship, The Dude blocks incoming laser blasts, and they avoid missiles fired at them as they dash into the ship. The Dude quickly sits down in the pilot seat, booting up all systems while Gryposaurus closes the back hatch, with which they take off and get the hell out of there.
Gryposaurus: What about Nodosaurus?
The Dude looks down, seeing the massive S.T.A.X. robot beneath them.
The Dude: He should be down there somewhere!
He narrows his eyes and sees some dot running around the machine’s legs.
The Dude: Yeah that’s him!
Gryposaurus: So how do we get him, with that thing around?
The Dude: We’re gonna have to do something, distract him or I dunno… Go arm the ship's cannon and we’ll blast him.
Down below, Capitalsaurus notices the ship hovering above them.
Capitalsaurus: Oh, are those your annoying friends?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrS4kS6enw4
The robots eye flashes an even brighter red, before unleashing a laser beam.
The Dude: EVASIVE ACTION
He narrowly avoids the blast, just as Gryposaurus seizes control of the ships weapons, blasting the robot with missiles as a counter, the machine shields itself with its arm.
Nodosaurus (down from below): Yeah! Show him!
Capitalsaurus: *groans* I should have just crushed you in my hands back then. I wanted to like, sell your organs first and then that would kill you, but I guess you’re just annoying like that.
Nodosaurus: I mean to be honest, we probably wouldn’t have gotten away so easily if your robot guys were actually competent.
Capitalsaurus: Nonsense! They’re the best employees you could ever have! They don’t get sick, they don’t ask for raises, they don’t get paid to begin with, they don’t ask to see their famil-
He is then blasted by more missiles from The Dude and Gryposaurus on the ship
Capitalsaurus: DON’T SHOOT AT ME WHEN I’M TALKING!
The robot sprints after the ship, leaping into the air, Capitalsaurus has it slam its fist down, trying to crush the spaceship, but The Dude manages to avoid it and the bot and it’s fist slams into the ground, but the gust of air caused by the machines movements cause the ship too loose stability, The Dude tries to re-stabilize the flight.
Down below, Nodosaurus sees the ship isn’t too far from the robot, and the robot has its fist stuck in the ground.
Nodosaurus: Now’s my chance!
He dashes forward using the force, leaping onto the robot's arm and sprinting upwards.
Capitalsaurus: Huh?
With S.T.A.X’s other arm, Capitalsaurus tries crushing Nodosaurus like a mosquito on his arm, but the jedisaur moves fast, avoiding the attack.
Gryposaurus: What is he doing?
The Dude: If he bounces off its head he could reach us! Open the hatch!
Reaching the machine’s shoulder, Nodo-Windu leaps onto the robot’s head and bounces towards the ship, Gryposaurus opens the hatch just in time and he makes a smooth landing right inside
Nodosaurus: There you guys are! Now get us out of here!
The Dude: On it!
With some buttons clicked, they make a jump for hyper-space, vanishing instantly.
Capitalsaurus manages to tear his fist out of the ground and raises it threateningly towards the sky.
Capitalsaurus: You can run cowards! But that’s one of my ships! I will track you down again, fools!
In space the 3 dipshits celebrate.
Nodosaurus: We did it! We’re free!
The Dude: Oh, I almost forgot! I got your laser sword back.
He chucks it towards Nodo-Windu, who ignites it after catching, giving a few swings.
Nodosaurus: Hell yeah.
The Dude: So tell me boys, is there any place you want to go now after that?
Gryposaurus: Actually, yes…
Nodosaurus: Huh.
Gryposaurus: Tyrantia… the tournaments must be stopped!
Nodosaurus: Ehhhhhh…
Gryposaurus: What do you mean? You were there too! You saw what they’re doing to people!
Nodosaurus: I mean yeah, that's bad and all, but I don’t really feel like it…
Gryposaurus: Bruh
The Dude: Lmao
Gryposaurus: You’re just gonna let it happen?
Nodosaurus: Am I really the bad guy for not wanting to risk getting put into a death tournament again?
The Dude: He has a point.
Gryposaurus: Pussy.
Nodosaurus: You know what they say… you are what you eat
*Nodo-Windu smirks as Gryposaurus starts tweaking*
Gryposaurus: *sigh* What about you?
The Dude: I guess I can throw you off there, but unless you can pay me I’m not getting involved. Gotta stay on the grind you know.
Gryposaurus: All right, fuck you two guys, I’m gonna go there alone.
Nodosaurus: Oh well, it was nice while it lasted.
The Dude: Yeah, we better get going before he tries to kill you.
Gryposaurus: Yeah,go drop me off and go do your stupid side hustles.
The Dude: Why you beefing with me? I wasn’t even there, I just teleported in on the last day, it’s none of my business.
Meanwhile in the Tyrant Lair, they’re working out and shit. Kelbeam is going apeshit on a punching bag.
Kelbeam: Left hook…! Right hook…! Elbow strike… and BOOM Super-Kick!
His kick bends the punching bang in half, ripping it open, its filling drops onto the ground.
Kelbeam: Yeah! That’s what I’m talking about!
Savage slithers in and takes a bite out of the filling on the floor.
Savage Almond: Mmmmm… this thing’s guts are really yummy, just like cardboard fr
Kelbeam: I was gonna have my minions clean it up, but enjoy I guess…
Nizaluddin flies in, taking the form of an Ark Argentavis.
Nizaluddin: Training huh, I guess that makes sense, we gotta be in shape if we want to destroy them.
Mimikyutube also comes in, dragging a dumbbell tied to his tail on the floor.
Mimikyutube: Yeah, I’m training all right.
Nizaluddin: So outside of some warming up, is there any battle plan?
Savage Almond: Oh I have a plan!
Nizaluddin: Really?
Kelbeam: Well, what is it?
Savage Almond: Step 1, M lures them in with that fake invitation. Step 2, we wait for them to come, step 3 they show up and uhh step 4 is uhhh… we kick their asses.
Mimikyutube: Epico
Nizaluddin: So yeah, like I thought. Well, I guess if we’re in this now, I better get training then.
Kelbeam: I could spot for you in some exercises or something like that.
Nizaluddin: Yeah, that’d be cool
Then M descends from above.
M: Alright, I have the little invitation ready and I’m just about to send it!
Nizaluddin: So like what, you filled it with some bureaucratic nonsense?
M: Obviously. Here’s a preview: ‘We formally request the presence of esteemed IRS representatives to discuss compliance adjustments regarding intergalactic revenue collection under the jurisdiction of extraterritorial financial structuring.’
Kelbeam: Wha- …what the fuck does that even mean?!
M: I DON’T KNOW
Savage Almond: That means you cooked.
Mimikyutube: Well then, back to training!
He turns around and accidentally swings the dumbbell tied to his tail into Kelbeams shin.
Kelbeam: GAHH, FUCK
He drops to the ground clutching his shin.
Mimikyutbe: Ooopsie…
Meanwhile above the planet, the 3 dipshits come out of hyperspace.
The Dude: well, here we are, Tyrantia…
Nodosaurus: Are you sure you want to do it, we can still head back now.
Gryposaurus: I’m not changing my mind.
Nodosaurus: Well, if that’s what you want… here take this.
He gives him his lightsaber.
Nodosaurus: You’ll need some practice but it could come in handy.
Gryposaurus: …thanks, I’m still mad you’re not going but this helps a little.
But then, suddenly IRS jumpscare, the S.T.A.X. robot flies in with a squadron of space tax bots and a voice in the radio speaks out.
Capitalsaurus: You thought you could get away from the IRS?!
The Dude: HOW DID YO- oh right, it’s your ship of course you can track it.
Capitalsaurus: Surrender now and I promise your deaths will be quick.
Nodosaurus: How about no?
Capitalsaurus: Well then, welcome to die! Attack!
The robot raises its hand, pointing forward and all the Space Tax bots charge towards the dipshits.
Back down on Tyrantia, Kelbeam is still overreacting:
Kelbeam: I AM DYING
The rest of the tyrants watch his fit in silence, when one of Savage’s henchmen comes in, with some fancy binoculars, passing it to the 50 foot mulga snek and pointing to the sky.
He snatches the binoculars and sees the Space Tax Bots fighting the stolen ship.
Savage Almond: Oooh, fireworks!
M: What..? Can I have a look?
Savage Almond: Yeah!
Kelbeam: AAAA-Okay, what’s this about?
M: Oh…
Kelbeam: The fuck you mean ‘Oh’, what does that mean?
M: It’s our friends from the IRS…
Nizaluddin: Already? Damn they’re quick.
M: No, I didn’t even send the invitation yet!
Nizaluddin: What? Why are they here then?
Kelbeam: Doesn’t matter. We’re going to kill them… and then kill them AGAIN
Mimikyutube: Based.
They all fly off, leaving Savage Almond behind.
Savage Almond: Ay! What about me?!
M comes back down and snatches Almond in one of his tentacles.
Savage Almond: Thancc
The Dude: We’re hit!
He loses control of the ship and they fall into S.T.A.X’s hands.
Capitalsaurus: Before I kill you, I’d like to add it wasn’t even nice to know you and you smell b-
The Tyrants make an entrance, with Kelbeam blasting the IRS with fireballs, causing S.T.A.X to drop the damaged ship and it drifts away in space, they descend from above making Jojo poses and shit.
Capitalsaurus: Who are you?!
M: We’re the tyrants, the last people you’ll ever see!
Capitalsaurus: Oh great! Another bunch of morons who think they can stop the IRS...
Mimikyutube: Except we’re not gonna stop you, we’ll fucking murder you!
Capitalsaurus: You don’t stand a chance! We’re armed with the latest technology all generously funded by taxpayer dollars! Like this baby!
He does a bunch of poses to show off the S.T.A.X. robot.
Nizaluddin: Good thing we weren’t paying any.
Capitalsaurus: Yet!
Kelbeam: I don’t care what you send our way, we ARE NOT paying taxes! Not even a single cent!
Capitalsaurus: Soon you will, the IRS always gets what's theirs! Taxes are inevitable!
Kelbeam: Over my dead body.
The pokemon claps.
Mimikyutube: Damn, Kelpeak.
Savage Almond: Bro really thinks some tin cans will stop us. That’s crazy.
Capitalsaurus: I ALREADY TOLD THEY’RE THE MOST ADVANCED-
Savage Almond: Quit yapping before I sleep with your mother.
Nizaluddin: By the way, quick question - how much of those tax-payer dollars went into making you look like an absolute tool?
Capitalsaurus: THAT’S IT, YOU’RE DEAD
Savage Almond: I guess that means, it is time to cook.
M: Let’s show them why we run this corner of the galaxy.
Beam cracks his knuckles.
Kelbeam: The big one’s mine.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QIEINTJYXoc
The Tyrant’s Charge forward, with a war cry Kelbeam grows to kaiju proportions and flies towards S.T.A.X, decking it in the face with his fist, the machine responds swinging its arm towards beam, who weaves under the strike, and floats upward before bringing his horn down onto the bastard, sending it flying through empty space.
Capitalsaurus: Sneaky little shit!
Kelbeam grins to himself and flies towards the robot, trying to slam his foot into it, but the machine dashes to the side and he just flies by, taking a while to break his momentum. He turns around to see S.T.A.X. firing a red laser towards him, so he twists and turns over the beam, narrowly avoiding being hit, as he’s avoiding the attack he spits out a fireball towards the attacker, hitting it in the chest, dazing it briefly. Using the moment to close the gap between them, Kelbeam then swings his tail towards S.T.A.X. trying to hit it with his tail club, but the robot catches his tail.
Capitalsaurus: Hah! Gotcha!
The machine spins its upper torso like a helicopter, swinging Kelbeam in circles, until finally throwing him through the void of space, Beamus flies uncontrollably, trying to stabilize himself, while Capitalsaurus activates S.T.A.X’s boosters to catch up to him.
Savage Almond: Alright! Throw me!
M groans as he chucks Savage towards the nearest Tax Bot, which explodes as Savage collides with it. Savage bounces from one bot to another, his momentum turning him into a living missile, detonating each bot on impact. The battlefield is a mess of metal chunks and explosions by the time he slows down. After losing his momentum, he manages to slither himself in the zero gravity battlefield to a confused Tax Bot frantically looking around after losing sight of him.
Savage Almond: Squish!
He coils himself around the thing and crushes it with his body like a can of soda. Immediately searching for more bots to scrap, spotting 4 bots firing missiles at him, so the Almond lunges to the side avoiding them, he smacks one of the missiles with the tip of his tail, knocking itstraight back into one of its pals, causing them to explode, Savage then dashes forward and chomps the second bot in half, while smacking the third one into oblivion with his tail. He then sees another bot trying to punch him from the flanks.
Savage Almond: Vore!
Opening his mouth wide, he swallows the attacker whole. His forked tongue smacking his lips after.
Savage Almond: oh uh
He then finds himself surrounded by the bots, their arms pointing towards him with their laser guns aimed, so Savage spits out the bits of the Tax Bot he just swallowed like a fricking machine gun, shredding through their forces
S.T.A.X. grabs Kelbeam and repeatedly punches him in the face, Kelbeam manages to grab his arm and kick himself off him, flying away, Capitalsaurus activates the boosters again and dashes towards beam, trying to punch him, but Beam leans to the side, the robots fist barely scraping the side of his face, while Kelbeam swings his own fist and absolutely decks the machine in the face, Capitalsaurus loses control over it as it spins uncontrollably, Kelbeam thinks quickly, dashing after the robot, managing to grab it by the legs and holding off its arms with his feet, rendering it unable to break free of his grasp.
Capitalsaurus: Let me go!
Kelbeam: Aight, I’ll put you down real quick.
With a grunt Kelbeam flies downwards, towards the surface of Tyrantia, landing eith a loud crash and an impact that causes a massive cloud of debris to rise, as the dust clears it reveals a crater caused by the attack, Kelbeam walks around the robot as it slowly gets back up. Capitalsaurus groans in rage as Kelbeam waves his hands invitingly, beckoning him to attack.
Up above Tyrantia, Nizaluddin flies towards the attacking Tax Bots, evading some lasers with a barrel roll, he flies upwards, before ąshapeshifting into a Paraceratherium and dropping down onto the attackers below, crushing them with the massive animals feet. Turning back into an Argentavis he evades more lasers and regains altitude, until one of the Tax Bot fires missiles towards him. Nizal reacted quickly turning into a Gallimimus, using the speedy dinosaurs form to leap from one missile to another, and then kicking the attacking Tax Bots head off, bouncing off with an acrobatic flip and turning into a Nanuqsaurus, crushing another Tax Bot’s head between his jaws and then throwing it into another with a twist of his body. As he descends again another Tax Bots fired a cable towards him, he shapeshifts into a Natovenator, landing on top of the cable and running up it, tearing into the Tax Bot with the little creatures claws and teeth, destroying it from the inside. Nizaluddin ran on top of the Tax Bots head and used the following explosion to propel himself through the void of space, to another Tax Bot which was firing down at him from above, turning into a Parasaurolophus, Nizaluddin swung his head at the bot and cleaved it in two.
Back below on Tyrantia, Kelbeam continues clashing with S.T.A.X, leaping forward and drop kicking the robot, he quickly gets back to his feet, as the machine does a T-pose.
Kelbeam: Huh?
S.T.A.X’s upper body then begins spinning in circles, as it matches towards Beam, he walks back trying to figure out how to get through this offense.
Kelbeam: What if I…?
Kelbeam leaps into the air and with an acrobatic maneuver flies over the robot and blasts it with a fireball, causing it to stop spinning and knocking it off balance.
Capitalsaurus: Ah shit!
Kelbeam lands smoothly behind him, and immediately turns around to kick him in the back, sending the robot flying and falling onto its ass.
Capitalsaurus: GRAH! Now the paint is scratched, you’ll pay for that!
Kelbeam: Did you know I can speen too?
Capitalsaurus: What
Kelbeam jumps off the ground again and spins in the air while hovering, hitting S.T.A.X. in the face with his club repeatedly, after which he pauses briefly in the air, before he drops down, slamming his elbow into the machine. He tries to keep the punishment coming, swinging his fists towards the machine when it activates a shield on its left arm and hits him in the face with it, stunning him briefly, before it kicks him in the stomach, knocking him back.
*heavy metal pauses*
We cut to the damaged ship, the three dipshits inside are watching the explosions caused by the fray.
The Dude: Alright! They’re too busy with each other, if there’s time for us to get away it’s now.
Nodosaurus: Can you still pilot this thing?
The Dude: I should be able to get it far enough from here, we’d have to ditch it anyway in order to lose the feds.
Nodosaurus: So, Gryposaurus…
Gryposaurus: I made up my mind, I’m going down there and ending it all.
The Dude: We’ll then, if that’s what you want, get in the escape pod, we’ll launch you towards Tyrantia.
Gryposaurus: Alright. I still think you’re pussies for not going with me, but farewell.
Nodosaurus: yeah, yeah, goodluck down there, bye.
Gryposaurus: *sigh* Thanks, I guess.
The Dude: see you around someday.
With that The dude presses the button to launch Gryposaurus towards Tyrantia, they watch their friend descend onto the planet and salute in respect.
The Dude: Ok, now we gotta bail.
Nodosaurus: What’s our status?
The Dude: The hyper-drive is fucked, but the main boosters work, we have plenty of fuel left which should be enough to get pretty far.
Nodosaurus: Nice. Let’s go then.
They fly away.
Nodosaurus: …I kinda expected this to be a more entertaining sequence.
The Dude: If it works, it works.
*heavy metal resumes*
Mimikyutube: I’M GONNA KILL EVERYONE
Mimik flies forward, straight towards a horde of the tax bots.
Mimik: WOOD HAMMER
He spins, slamming its tail into one of the bots, obliterating it, the force of his strike bouncing him towards another bot, whose head he smacks clean off with another tail strike. He then dashes to the side to evade laser fire, while charging up an attack of his own.
Mimikyutube: THUNDERBOLT
Summoning a lightning strike, straight at one of the bots, frying it dead and dazing those around him, he flies in to pick them off.
Mimikyutube: SHADOW CLAW
With 4 quick swings, he slices the remaining ones apart.
Noticing more stragglers, Mimik uses Shadow Sneak, vanishing into thin air. The bots frantically look around and each only has just enough time to see one of their own get discarded by Mimik, before they get pierced by his shadowy form.
Mimik then reappears and another group of bots fires missiles at him. He narrows his eyes and twists his head.
Mimik: …Let’s Snuggle Forever
A black shadowy body protrudes from beneath Mimik’s disguise, revealing his true form. 2 red eyes pierce darkness as it spreads wide and large, swallowing all incoming missiles, with a swift move, the shadows retract and Mimik goes back to normal as if nothing happened.
Mimikyutube: CONFUSE RAY!
He blasts the group with a purple ray that leaves them all confused, cracking his neck, Mimik prefers for his next attack.
Mimikyutube: HYPER BEAM!
Unleashing a fiery destruction laser, Mimik blows all remaining bots on his watch to hell.
Back to Kelbeam fighting S.T.A.X., he leaps into the air and tries to deliver a flying kick to the machine, using his anti-gravity flight to propel himself into the robot for maximum damage, but the attack is blocked by its shield.
Kelbeam: Come on!
Kelbeam flies off the shield and tries ramming into it with his foot repeatedly to no effect, as Beam goes apeshit on the shield, S.T.A.X.’s right arm turns into a wrecking ball.
Capitalsaurus: Mace Mecha Punch!
Timing the attack right, Capitalsaurus rotates the robots torso, extending the wrecking ball on a chain and slamming it into Kelbeam’s flank, sending him flying, as Beam hits the ground, Capitalsaurus retracts the wrecking ball and if turns back into the machine’s hand, then reaches over its back to unsheath an orange glowing sword, Kelbeam picks himself back up and realizes he’s gonna have to go on the defense. With an angry groan, Capitalsaurus has the machine charge forward, swinging and thrusting its sword towards Kelbeam, who keeps fast on feet, sidestepping all moves. S.T.A.X. swings its sword in a wide arc, Kelbeam parries it with the bony blade on his forearm, knocking the robot off rhythm, Kelbeam quìckly grabs its wrist with his right hand and swipes his forearm blade into its head with his other arm, the force of the strike has the robot spinning, leaving its back turned towards Beam, who grabs it and hurls it upwards. As S.T.A.X. soars through the air, Kelbeam aims his fireball and blasts it before it hits the sky.
Kelbeam: Chat, I’m cooking here.
S.T.A.X. crashes into the ground, but swiftly gets back up.
Capitalsaurus: Don’t get cocky, shithead!
Beam cackles to himself and breathes a stream of flames towards the robot, which blocks it with its shield and charges forward, ramming into Kelbeam, as the tyrant staggers backwards, Capitalsaurus charges up the robots eye laser and blasts Kelbeam, who is pushed back by the blast and soon after a massive fireball erupts.
Capitalsaurus laughs maniacally, thinking he won, when Kelbeam bursts out from the flames, flipping through the air, he lands upside down on top of S.T.A.X. supporting himself with his arm.
Kelbeam: I ain’t done yet!
Capitalsaurus groans angrily again, trying to shake him off, but Kelbeam does a front flip, slamming his legs into his robot, Beam then lands on the ground smoothly and goes into a battle pose.
Cutaway, the last one, we’re almost done here.
So we cut to M, who scans the battlefield with a menacing glare, quickly finding the nearest targets, he flies forward and stretches his 4 tentacles, each impaling one bot with their speared tip, throwing them all off, M then extends the spikes on his hands to stab into another bot, spreading his arms out to tear the bitch little robot in two, the metal army opens fire onto him, but his spiked shell proves impenetrable to them, as he precisely takes them out one by one by blasting fireballs out of his tentacles. M spreads his wings out and flies towards another large group of bots, slicing apart stragglers along the way with his Scalpel Beams. Flying right in the middle of the robot group, M channels force from all over his body, dazing all bots around him, he then spins in circles, firing his scalpel beams from his tentacles, cutting them all apart. A lone survivor shakes in fear as M flies up to him, before electrocuting him with force lightning.
Seeing no other targets around, the snek cheers.
Savage Almond: HOORAY, ALL GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS ARE NOW DEAD.
Mimik: Ah, sucks, I was just getting started…
M: That will show ‘em.
Back as an Argentavis, Nizal looks down on Tyrantia beneath them
Nizaluddin: I wonder how Kel’s doing down there…
Capitalsaurus has S.T.A.X. charge forward, swinging his sword at Beam, who slides on the ground beneath the strike and into the robot's legs, toppling it. Kel gets up quickly and jumps to drop his knee down onto S.T.A.X while it's still down, the machine turns on its back and fires its eye laser at Beam, forcing him to dodge and allowing it to stand back up.
Capitalsaurus: Just piss off and die already!
S.T.A.X’s upper torso spins around, stretching its arms outwards, turning itself into a bladed tornado.
Kelbeam: Two can play at that game!
Kelbeam levitates off the ground spinning in circles, the two fly towards eachother and Kelbeam slams his tail into S.T.A.X’s sword, shattering into pieces, they land with their backs facing each other, Capitalsaurus looks at his shattered swords and groans angrily again.
Capitalsaurus: You piece of shit! You know how much that costed?
Kelbeam, just grins and shrugs, while walking around nonchalantly awaiting his next move. Capitalsaurus tries the mace mecha punch move again, turning the robots right hand into a spiked wrecking ball and firing it outwards on chain towards Beamus, who dashes to the side and then steps down on the chain, preventing it from being retracted.
Capitalsaurus: What? Give it back!
Kelbeam: Come and get it!
The tyrant grabs the join and pulls it towards himself, sending the robot flying towards him. Beam stretches his arm out and slams it into the robot's face as it flies towards him. He turns around, trying to punch it but it parries with its shield and Beam recoils his hand in pain, using this moment, S.T.A.X. deactivates his shield grabs Kelbeam by the throat and slams him into the ground, still holding him it rotates its torso, swinging Beam in circles before chucking him at a nearby rock. Kelbeam twists himself in the air and bends his legs.
Kelbeam: We’re done here!
Beam bounces off the rock, shattering into a million pieces as he flies off into the robot, Capitalsaurus can’t react in time, as Kelbeam curls up into a ball, and with the row of spikes on his back he cuts right through the robot, splitting it perfectly in two.
Shrinking back to the other tyrants’ size, Kelbeam flies back to their lair where they meet up.
M: So, I guess it went smoothly on your end?
Kelbeam: Yeah, minimal trouble. Cut the bastard in two.
Mimikyutube: Peak.
Nizaluddin: If you told me when I woke up in the morning today, that we would destroy the IRS of all things, I would have called you crazy.
Mimikyutube: And if they ever show themselves here again, we’ll kill them all!
Savage Almond: Well, we already did, they dead as hell.
Kelbeam: Well, with this problem out of the way, I wanted to ask you M, is the new coliseum ready?
M: Not quite, still needs some finishing touches, but it should be done this week.
Kelbeam: Awesome.
Nizaluddin: Oh, another spin wheel?
Kelbeam: Yeah, and this one will be fun, it's gonna be full of aquatic critters.
Savage Almond: Like some sort of Kelbeam’s Aquatic Spin Wheel Battle?
A brief silence ensues, and Kelbwam slowly turns his head towards Savage.
Kelbeam: …say that again?
Cutting away to the crashed escape pod, somewhere in the tyrantian wasteland, the pterosaur, Tupuxuara deliradamus soars above, noticing the wreckage below. He descends to inspect it, landing on top of it. He sees the door is fucked up to the point it definitely can’t be opened and hears thrashing on the inside.
Tupuxuara deliradamus: Huh, someone’s trapped here, I should get Ostafrikasaurus to he-WOAH
A purple lightsaber blade pierces through the door, almost cutting the pterosaur up, he falls from the pod and hits the ground, as the lightsaber cuts a circle shaped hole, the critter trapped insided then kicks it off and squeezes through.
Gryposaurus: That was a rough landing… oh hey!
Tupuxuara gets up and shakes some dirt off himself.
Tupuxuara deliradamus: Hey… where did you come from.
Gryposaurus: It’s kinda a long story…
Tupuxuara deliradamus: I mean… I have time.
Gryposaurus: So, uhh I was in this coloseum and they forced us to fight and then-
Tupuxuara deliradamus: Woah, you were in out of the coloseums too? That’s cool! I was in one too and won, so how did it end for you?
Gryposaurus: Well this Megaraptor bounty hunter showes up and tried to kill us, we stole his teleporting device but he had a back up one, we ate his chicken nuggies and it made the beef personal, but we got tight with each other after I found one last chicken nuggy remaining and gave it to him, then my friend was chased by the IRS and they had a giant robot, they caught us but we escaped and they threw me off here…
The pterosaur appears confused trying to process all that
Tupuxuara deliradamus: Oh so you didn’t win by yourself? Fucking poser lmao
Gryposaurus: What?!
Tupuxuara deliradamus: I meant to ask why you came back, you were basically free…
Gryposaurus: I want to stop the tyrants from making people play their little death games…
Tupuxuara deliradamus: Huh. Well that’s good, I have a pal who wants to do the same.
Gryposaurus: Great, where is he?
Tupuxuara deliradamus: Behind you
Gryposaurus: Huh
Ostafrikasaurus: Hello there!
Gryposaurus: GAH
Meanwhile in space, a fance new ship named Forced Labor 2 flies up a space McDonald’s.
The Dude: Alright, what do you want?
Nodosaurus: I'll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese…
The end or smth
(My suffering is finally over)
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